My World in Darkness
by nellaselfgirl
Summary: Donatello is captured and tortured by Hun. Rated M for some language and overall dark theme.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT.

A/N: I've had this idea for a while now. So here it goes. (Just to let you know detail has been one of my weak spots with writing so any tips on that would be helpful)

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Prologue:

I never saw this coming. I thought it was over. The Shredder had been destroyed, and everything was fine.

It started off as a normal day for us. Master Splinter was in the kitchen making a pot of tea. Leo and Raph were watching TV and fighting over the remote and what channel to watch, as usual. Mikey was skateboarding around the lair and I had recently had a breakthrough with an experiment. This is very exciting for me, I have created a new kind of technology that I know only I have. This technology enhances sight and hearing. If someone were to use this, they would be able to see and hear through the thickest walls, and it can be adjusted to a certain distance. It'll be very useful to us incase we need to stop the Foot or any other enemy we might encounter. Then April called me and asked me to help her fix the hot water heater that just won't stay working. I told her I would be over in a few minutes. I groaned I was not feeling well, I been a little under the weather lately.

I got up from my desk and let Master Splinter know that I was going over April's for a little bit, he then gave me a 3 minute and 27 second lecture about being careful and not being seen up above. I don't understand why he lectures us about this so often we know how dangerous it is for us topside, that's why he's teaching us Ninjitsu. So, trying my hardest to not sound annoyed, I assured him that I would be careful and left the lair.

I wasn't out of the sewers for long when I heard footsteps behind me I turned around and just barely dodged an attack from a Foot soldier. I pulled out my bo staff and blocked a katana that almost sliced my head open. I quickly took out about seven ninjas. I thought I was done, but then more came, I was completely out numbered, but I still fought hard and I was able to take out a good number of them. But they just kept coming. I had no choice I had to get away from here. I kicked one ninja in the chest and sent him flying into a group, knocking them over. I jumped over the pile of dizzy ninjas and started to run as fast as my legs would allow.

I knew they were running after me. I had to stay focused. I was never so keen about fighting as much as my brothers were. I mean c'mon I was the first turtle to be out during the Battle Nexus competition. I kept running even though I was out of breath. I could feel something coming from behind. I did a side roll and avoided a bunch of ninja stars, and kept running. Then something hit my leg and exploded. I screamed in pain and fell; both of my legs were covered in some sort of chemical acid. I could hear it sizzle against my flesh and I could feel it burn. I just sat there as the Foot surrounded me. One kneeled down beside me holding a syringe. I tried to punch him but he blocked it. Another Foot ninja held my wrists firmly behind my back. Between the pain in my legs and being worn out from the fight, I had no choice but to let the Foot ninja inject me with the tranquilizer. I suddenly became dizzy, my vision started to blur and everything went black.

When I woke up I found my self strapped to a table that was tilted at a 45° angle. I look around the room; I see some tools that are related to surgery and the rest look like torture tools. I think I know what's about to happen. I wince in pain. My legs are burned very badly; I don't think I'll be able to walk. I hear heavy footsteps approaching the metal door that is directly in front of me. Then Hun walks in.

"Greeting Donatello," he says, "I am so pleased that you're here,"

"Really?" I say sarcastically, "Last I checked you wanted me and my family dead,"

"Oh I still want that. But first I want some information about the wonderful technology you have created. Now why don't you tell me and your suffering won't last very long."

What! How does he know about the technology? "I don't know what you're talking about,"

"Of course I wasn't expecting you to tell me right away, but I can be very persuasive. We'll start off slow, after all I need you alive."

I feel his hand wrap around my right index finger. He jerks his hand and in one smooth motion I feel pain fly through my hand and I heard a snap. I let out a small cry.

"Just let me know when you want to talk,"

He breaks the other two fingers; I squeeze my eyes shut and straining not to scream. I feel him place my other hand in something cold; it feels like a metal glove. But I don't want to know. I feel the glove get tighter around my hand; it's starting to hurt. It gets tighter and I whimper in pain, I can hear Hun laugh. It gets tighter and tighter, I can take it anymore. I start screaming. Hun laughs louder my hand is now completely crushed. He takes the metal glove off and starts to beat me. He punches me, hits me with metal pipes, a lot of my bones are broken. I know Hun is getting pleasure from this. It makes me sick knowing that my screaming is only feeding that pleasure but I just can't help it.

He keeps on beating me, when he finally stops he undoes the straps that are holding me to the table; I fall and hit the floor hard. I'm in too much pain to move. Hun kneels down beside me and turns me on my back; he shines a bright light in my face. My eyes burn and my head swims.

"So what do you want to tell me?" Hun interrogates.

"N-no-th-th-ing," I say with great difficulty. Hun slams his fist against my face he kicks me in the stomach I gasp in pain. Then he grabs my ankles and I feel myself being dragged. I think I'm being dragged down a hall he stops for a moment. I hear him open a door and he throws me in a cell. The word 'escape' flows through my mind. I attempt to get up and run for the opened door, but waves of pain flow through my entire body so I just lay there on the cold stone floor and shake as the sound of the big metal door slamming shut make my head throb. I will never tell him. This new technology I have created can easily be used for evil. I knew this from the beginning, but I was extremely careful not to use it outside of the lair. How the shell did he discover this?

I start to cry, partially from the pain but mostly from feeling so helpless, I miss my family. I miss being fourteen. When my brothers and I were fourteen we didn't have these problems, everything was so simple and fun. Ever since we turned fifteen everything became complicated and our world was turned upside down. When is it going to end?


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

Here I am now in a small dark and cold cell, I can barley move and I think my cold got worse. Even if I wasn't in pain I couldn't go far anyways my ankles and wrists are chained together. I have no idea what day or time it is. Every breath I take it feels like I'm being stabbed to death. I feel so helpless. But I know that my family will be looking for me, and I know that they _will_ find me.

The cell door opens, the light and the noise makes my head swim. I squeeze my eyes shut. I feel a big powerful hand grab the back of my neck and lift me off the ground. I still haven't opened my eyes, but I know its Hun.

"I am getting very impatient with you Donatello,"

I open my eyes and look straight into Hun eyes, "You really think I care?" I say with great difficulty. Hun throws me as hard as he can into the wall. Pain rushes through my body and I feel like I'm being whirled around by a huge wave. Hun picks me up again.

"Perhaps you would like a repeat of this morning?" Hun says. He undoes the chains around my ankles and wrists, and I try to punch him but my hand doesn't even make a fist. He drags me out of the cell and down the hall and into the torture chamber. Hun straps me down to the table.

"Now, let's see if you can understand the question this time," Hun turns on a light the hurts my eyes and head. I squeeze my eyes shut again for a moment. "What kind of technology have you acquired?"

"Don't know…what…the hell…you're talking…about," I say between breaths. Hun takes a knife and holds it against my face.

"Do you know now?"

"Fuck you," Hun slowly slides the knife down my face, I moan and whimper from the pain and I can feel the blood dripping off my chin and down my neck.

"I'll stop when you decide you wanna talk," said Hun

He slides the knife down my arms and legs; I am now covered in my own blood. He slams a metal bat against my leg, breaking it. I let out a loud scream. He forces my right eye open and stabs it with a sharp metal rod and pulls out my eyes. When he finished he had a couple foot soldiers bandage up some of my bad injuries to keep me alive. That's what the Shredder wants to keep me alive until I talk. But I will never talk.

They throw me back in my cell and I just lay there, face down too tired and hurt to move. I think of my family and all the fun time we have, and sometimes and I swear I can see them. I'm probably dreaming, I can't really tell. I see Master Splinter standing before me instructing me on a technique I'm having trouble with. I can feel his warm gentle hands correcting the position of my arms and I can hear him clearly.

_"Raise your bow staff up a little more, Donatello," I do as he says, "now when you block my attack return to this position in order to better defend yourself against the next attack,"_

_ "Yes, Sensei," He leaps in the air and I block his first attack but when I return to the position I again keep my bow staff too low and when the second attack comes I just barley miss and his walking stick strikes my head._

_ "OW! Damn it!" _

_ "Patience my son, you will get it, I know you will. It will come with practice,"_

_ Then Master Splinter fades away and I see Mikey flying around on his hover-board with Raph running after him. _

_ "Ahhh! Donnie! Help! Raph's gaining on me!" yells Mikey_

_ I just stand there laughing alongside Leo. "Hey Leo, you ready?"_

_ "Yeah," says Leo as we head into my lab._

_ "You know you don't have to do this if you don't want to," I say_

_ "No, I want to. I feel bad that you have to fix everything around here. I thought if I knew how to fix some things then it would take some of the pressure off of you,"_

_ "Thanks, I appreciate it, Leo," We both look at the door to the main area for a moment as we hear the familiar sounds of Raph catching Mikey. Then we exchange an amused look and I start to instruct Leo on how to fix out shell cells, as they get damaged more often._

I can't tell if I'm asleep or hallucinating. But I can barley feel the pain anymore, whatever's going on I don't want it to stop.


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

_"Mikey! You have got to stop bugging Raph so much," I say as I hand Mikey an icepack, "This is why you have headaches all the time,"_

_ "What's the fun in not annoying Raph? Admit it the one time I got you in on one of the pranks you had a blast…until he tackled and clunked our heads together,"_

_ "The prank part was fun, but I learned my lesson after that. I'm starting to wonder when you will learn yours," I said as I put the water on for pasta. Then Master Splinter came in._

_ "Michelangelo, it seems I have a lesson to teach you after dinner," said Master Splinter._

_ "Yes, Sensei," Mikey buried his face in his hands, "ow" Master Splinter sat down next to Mikey and placed his fingers on Mikey's temples and started rubbing them._

_ "Close your eyes and breathe deeply, my son and do not say anything," Mikey did as Master Splinter told him although the staying quiet looked very difficult for him. Splinter moved his fingers to back of Mikey's head and rubbed for another minute. Then he stopped._

_ "Open your eyes," Mikey opened them._

_ "What the shell. My headaches gone, Sensei you're awesome! How do you do these thing?"_

_ "I learned this when you boys were little,"_

_ I chuckled, "let me guess, it cause we gave you headaches?" Master Splinter smiled. _

I was pulled out of my pleasant dream when a bright light hit me like a huge wave. I felt my self being lifted off the ground and I heard a deep and angry voice say something, but I couldn't hear the words. I just dangled there my eyes still closed. Then I was being dragged back to the torture chamber.

When I was strapped to the table I opened my good eye and tired to focus. I could see Hun standing in front of me. He punched me across the face, I grunted on the impact. He punched me again.

"I'm getting really tired of you," he said, "you will tell me what I want to know now!" He held a metal rod in front of my other eye.

"I…will never…tell…you," Hun grinds his teeth in anger and drives the rod in my other eyes and I feel it rip out of my socket. The pain is unbearable! I can't take this anymore! I with he'd just kill me. I scream, and now everything's black. Part of me wants to just tell him so this agony will end. But I know what they'll do with this knowledge. So many people will be in danger if I tell him. I can't tell him! I can't! No matter how much I want to I just can't.

"You know you're family is here," said Hun. Fear suddenly strikes my heart.

"Where…?"

"They're alright, still fighting their way up here. I want to make sure you're hurt enough so they will do anything for you. I'll get my information then,"

"You're…wasting…you time…they don't…know…anything 'bout…this technology,"

He smashed something against my plastron, and I think one of my ribs snapped. I cry out in pain. Then I hear a loud crash. I almost expected it to be a blow from Hun but then I hear something that gave me so much hope.

"Release my son!"

"Oh my god! Donnie!" My family has found me!

"…guys…" I croak out.

I feel Hun hold something against the side of my head. I think it's a gun.

"You want you're dear brother to live? You get him to tell me what I want to know,"

Then I hear Master Splinter's battle cry and I feel Hun being forced away from me. Then I feel two pairs of hands untie me and gently lower me to the ground. I feel someone…Mikey…hug me. I rest my head on his shoulder.

"Mikey…I…missed you," I say

"I missed you to bro,"

"How…long…"

"Shhh, don't talk. You need to rest," I can feel Mikey hold me in his arms. I feel like nothing can harm me now. I hear Hun scream. Then I feel my self being lifted off the ground and carried away. I feel so relaxed now…except for being in pain.

But I know everything will be all right.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

I don't know how long it's been since I was rescued. But all I know is that I'm happy. I'm lying on my bed and my wounds have been tended to. I still feel the pain but I feel wonderful.

"How bad are his injuries, April?" I hear Leo ask.

"Bad. He has a lot of broken bones, his legs are burned badly, he lost a lot of blood, and…he's blind,"

"Blind?" Raph says.

"Hun ripped his eyes out. Guys do you all have the same blood type?"

"Yes," replies Leo. I hear April and Leo doing something, most likely drawing blood. Then I feel someone stand next to me, I feel a hand on my head.

"Sensei," I say weakly. I stop when I feel moisture drip on my face. Was Master Splinter crying?

"Sensei?"

"My son, you are home, finally you are home," he sobs.

"I'll…be…ok," I say. He wraps his arms around me.

"I know you will my son, but I was so afraid that I had lost you. I thought I did when I saw you," he kisses me on the cheek, "but I have you back," I feel him move away.

"Sensei?"

"I am still here my son,"

"It's alright Donnie," says April, "I'm doing a blood transfusion," I relax and let April perform the transfusion. When she finished I feel my family standing around me.

"How long…has it been?" I ask.

"You spent two days in the Shredders headquarters, and it's been four hours since we rescued you," said Leo.

"It took us three tries to actually get in and get to you," said Raph, "Shredder has been boosting his security and his soldiers. Especially Foot-tech ninjas,"

"What did he want to know?" asked Leo

"Some technology that I started investigating," I said. Then I felt a wave of pain rush through my body. I gasp loudly. Then I feel Master Splinter and my brothers all holding me and comforting me. I feel Mikey carefully climb over me and lie down on my left side. Leo and Raph are sitting by my legs on either side, and Master Splinter is on my right singing in Japanese, this always makes me fall asleep. I doesn't matter how old I am, I still fall asleep once I hear our lullaby.

Usagi oishi kano yama

Kobuna tsurishi kano kawa

Yume wa ima mo megurite

Wasuregataki furusato.

Iki ni imasu?

Chichi haha

Tsutsuga nashi ya? Tomogaki

Ame ni kaze ni tsukete mo

Omoi izuru furusato.

Kokorozashi wo hatashite

Itsu no hi ni ka kaeran

Yama wa aoko furusato

Mizu wa kiyoki furusato.

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_"You will tell me what I want to know!" says Hun. I can feel the knife slice my skin. I can feel my bones breaking. I can feel the pain. What's going on? I thought I was rescued. Where's my family? Did I just dream the entire rescue? _

"NO!" I scream. I start moving and I can feel the pain rushing back. Where am I?

"My son!" I hear Master Splinter say. I can feel him hold me and calm me. Oh. Ok. I was just dreaming. I'm home I'm really home.

"Where you dreaming about your experience in the Shredder's headquarters?"

"Yes. I was so scared Sensei. I thought I had just dreamt about the rescue and I thought I was really back there. Oh god I'm in so much pain Sensei! I'm scared, I can't see, can't…breathe," I start panicking I can't breathe. Master Splinter holds me tighter and starts rocking me gently,

"Stay calm, my son. You are safe, I am here. Shhhh. I am here,"

I feel myself calming down I can breathe a little easier now, I can feel tears running down my face. I HATE this! I hate being blind, I hate being in pain! I've had about as much pain as I can take, I can't take anymore!

"Shhh. Donatello, it is alright you are safe. I will not leave your side until you are fully recovered. I promise," he continues to rock me, and I feel my fear fade away, for a while at least. Master Splinter gently wipes my tears away and I feel as calm as I can be at the moment.

"I'll be ok Master," I say.

"I know you will be you are very strong my son, but I wonder when you will be alright. Injures like these do not heal overnight, and I fear that you take on a similar brooding behavior like Leonardo did when we defeated the Shredder,"

"That won't happen," I hope that won't happen, "I'm more optimistic than Leo, especially in difficult situations. I'll heal, and everything will be alright,"

"Are you trying to convince me or yourself?" It's so impossible to hide anything from Master Splinter, as helpful as it is, it can be very annoying at times. I might as well just be honest with him.

My head droops down, "I guess I'm trying to convince both of us," I say.

"Donatello, I do not want you hiding anything from me. This is a dangerous time for you to be holding your feelings in. I want you talking to your brother about this as well. As I said to Leonardo, 'an unopened bottle will burst when it's internal pressure becomes too much to bare.' Please do not hide from your family as Leonardo did,"

"I won't Sensei, I promise,"

* * *

Every time I fall asleep I have the same dream, I feel like I was never rescued and that I'm back in the Shredders headquarters being tortured. It gets worse every time, and not being fully healed, waking from these horrid nightmares is extremely painful. I start thrashing and I actually fell out of the bed once. My landing was soft since Master Splinter and Leo caught me before I hit the floor. But I don't know how much of this I can take. My family always there for me when I need help, they are making my physical recovery so much easier for me, and they are trying to make my psychological recovery easier but that's more complicated.

Master Splinter is true to his word, he hasn't left my side for a week now, he is always there when I have a nightmare and when the pain comes back, he knows how to ease my anxiety attacks that I've been getting since I was rescued. My brothers are always trying to cheer me up, Mikey usually tells a joke that he made up and that doesn't make much sense. Leo talks to me about the mischief we got into when we were kids, that always cheers me up, and Raph…he's been helping me learn Braille, and he's been getting my favorite books in Braille for me, so I have something to do besides laying around all day.

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A/N: The song is Furusato (My Heart's Home).


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

It's been almost a month since my rescue and I am still recovering. My broken bones are getting close to being completely healed. But the hand that Hun crushed still hurt a lot. My external injuries are healed, and I'm getting use to being blind. It kind on sucks though. I can't really do any experiments without help, even if my hand weren't still broken.

Master Splinter thought it would be good for all of us if we took a little vacation and go up to the farmhouse for a couple weeks. So I'm sitting in the battle shell, taking with Raph as we drive out of the city. I wish I had my sight; it's so strange being in darkness. Especially if we're going to the farmhouse everything is so beautiful up there in the spring.

"How ya feelin' Donnie?" asks Raph.

"Alright," I answer, "it still hurts sometimes, but not nearly as bad as before,"

"Ya know you are very strong bro, I know I woulda snapped and jus told em everything at a point,"

"I don't believe that," I said, "you are the toughest of everyone in this family,"

"Well yeah but that doesn't mean I can handle torture for long," said Raph.

We finally arrived at the farmhouse; Raph helped me out of the battle shell and laid me down on the couch when we got inside, Master Splinter and Mikey made lunch. As I lay on the couch I can feel the pain starting to come back. I moan a little.

"Donnie are you ok?" asked Leo. He sounded worried.

"Yeah," I said with some difficulty, "it just hurts a little,"

"Where?"

"My hands and…my chest," I feel Leo sit beside me he gently takes my wrist in his hands and starts massaging the pressure points. The pain starts to ease up. Then I hear the door to the kitchen open.

"Hey, dudes here's lunch," says Mikey. Leo helps me sit up and I feel a tray being placed on my lap. Leo has to feed me my hands are still weak, especially my left hand, the one that Hun crushed. I may not be able to use it for a very long time. It's so weird not being able to take care of myself anymore, everything I do I need help. I can barely do the things I like on my own; I'm still a little slow with reading Braille but I know I'll get the hang of it soon.

"Don? Are you alright?" asks Leo, "I mean besides your physical injuries, is any of this…haunting you or…"

"Leo, I'm fine," I say, I'm lying I'm not fine. I just don't want him to worry. But Master Splinter told me to talk to my brothers about this. I can't disobey him. "Well…actually… not so much. I'm having nightmares and I can't stop thinking about it. Did you have nightmares and whatever about that final battle with the Shredder?"

"Yeah, I did. I know this is difficult to do but you have just appreciated that you're alive and even though you could have died, you didn't. And that's because of your actions. I mean if you had given up and told him, he would have killed you after he got what he wanted, you kept yourself alive because you didn't give in."

I feel a little better, "I just want my sight back. I can handle my other injuries, but Hun really got to me when he blinded me,"

"If you want I can teach you some of the thing the Ancient One taught me?"

"I think that would help. Thanks Leo,"

I'm healing I can feel it. In time my nightmares and fear will fade away and I will be able to get around without help. And I know I can do it because my family will be by my side through all of it. I'm also pretty sure that Hun is looking for me; I'll be ready for him. When I think about it sight can be distracting, my other senses will heighten with the lose of one. I'll be ready when I have to face Hun again.

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A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review.


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